USA Today:
     
WE'RE DEAD
    
The Wall Street Journal:
     
DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS
    
National Enquirer:
     
O.J. AND NICOLE, TOGETHER AGAIN
    
Playboy:
     
GIRLS OF THE APOCALYPSE
    
Microsoft Systems Journal:
     
APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE
    
Victoria's Secret Catalog:
     
OUR FINAL SALE
    
Sports Illustrated:
     
GAME OVER
    
Wired:
     
THE LAST NEW THING
    
Rolling Stone:
     
THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR
    
Readers Digest:
     
'BYE
    
Discover Magazine:
     
HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT
     
AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?
    
TV Guide:
     
DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!
    
Lady's Home Journal:
     
LOSE 10 LBS BY JUDGEMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET!
    
America Online:
     
SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN.  TRY CALLING BACK IN 15 MINUTES.
    
Inc. magazine:
     
TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE
    
Microsoft's Web Site:
     
IF YOU DIDN'T EXPERIENCE THE RAPTURE,
     
DOWNLOAD SOFTWARE PATCH RAPT777.EXE.
    
Sun:
     
ARMAGEDDON TOLERANT SOFTWARE NOW AVAILABLE!
 
Submitted by: Tom Gayno" @ earthlink.net
 
                                             
from:     THE ORACLE SERVICE HUMOR MAILING LIST